I like being told I did a good job. One of my favorite things to do is to teach God’s word. I enjoy teaching and I would be lying if there is not some small part of me that is bummed out when no one says, “Good job” when I am done. I hate this about myself. I hate that I like the attention. I hate that my flesh wants to use the Gospel of Christ for my own personal gain. I can honestly say that I feel God has led me into these opportunities and ultimately I want to see people’s lives changed. However, my pride is always near to me.
I read an article from Christianity Today called Pastoral Narcissism and it was convicting and edifying. In it the author used the following quote from T.S. Elliot:
“Half the harm that is done in this world is due to people who want to feel important. They don’t mean to do harm– but the harm does not interest them. Or they do not see it, or they justify it because they are absorbed in the endless struggle to think well of themselves.”
Were it not for grace… “Now I would remind you, brothers, of the gospel I preached to you, which you received, in which you stand, and by which you are being saved, if you hold fast to the word I preached to you–unless you believed in vain. For I delivered to you as of first importance what I also received: that Christ died for our sins in accordance with the Scriptures, that he was buried, that he was raised on the third day in accordance with the Scriptures.” 1 Cor 15:1-4. I read this verse and I don’t see my name—that’s good with me.